Thursday, September 5, 2013

My rock

It's been a hard week here. I don't know where it came from but I was blindsided. Grief is humiliating. 

My husband is my rock. He held me as I wailed. He got me inside when I became so paralyzed by fear and panic I literally could not move. Too terrified to take a step forward and lose more, too terrified to step into our Bram-less house. Standing raw and vulnerable in our drive way, at the mercy of any passing on-looker. He rescued me.

I screamed at my rock that this mess of a human is me forever, he shouldn't have to deal with this. But he reminded me that this is ours. That Bram is ours. That everyday of hurt we live through is because we got to have Bram at all. 

Maybe he didn't say it so eloquently, but I knew what he meant while he insisted on holding me and told me "Im never leaving you" 

I don't know how we would have gotten this far without him. Our family rock, our safest place. Thank you my sweet husband. I love you and I appreciate you more than I could ever say. Im so glad Bram is ours.



2 comments:

  1. Sorry I dont have an account otherwise I would put my name on it. I am so thankful you wrote this. I am so blessed to be your husband and the father of our children. Thanks for all that you and I am proud to be your rock!

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  2. You are so blessed to have such a wonderful husband, best friend, father of your precious ones in TJ! And he is very blessed to have you, too, Sweet Sami! <3

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Thanks for reading and loving Bram!