Tuesday, April 16, 2013

Exploiting tragedy

I never watch the news, I have facebook. Also on the news there is a lot of car accidents, and killed children, and other triggering information. But I have brilliant friends who are very news savvy, both the news that's reported and the news that's not so I stay up to date through them. Yesterday there was a bombing in Boston. I've avoided it, I've avoided reading more about it. I'm so sad for these people, for their families, for the children that were hurt, and the child who was killed. It's not ok.

Yet pretty soon after pictures of victims started creeping in to the newsfeed, pictures of the site, and the victim's AT the site, pictures of bloodied sidewalk and street, and media asking for pictures of the bombing. My stomach churns. These are not images to be shared or posted on facebook. These are horrendous scenes, these are people who have been destroyed, these are people with their blood all on the streets. It's not ok to violate them AGAIN by sensationalizing the scene, exploiting their pain. Yes the world needs to know, but the pictures, the crime scene photos? Stop.

I know when the news showed up right away the day Bram was killed I felt exploited. I felt like my pain was on display for other's entertainment. I wanted to be left alone to deal with my sons, to deal with losing Bram. I have to say if I found pictures circulating of Bram on the ground, of his mangled body... it would just be too much....

So I see these pictures of the bombing victims and the crime scene, showing up in my newsfeed without my choice, and I'm taken back. Taken to those moments of first seeing and the hundreds of thoughts occurring all at once when my baby was on the ground and his blood was flowing out of him, perfectly still and my other boys sobbing, and my husband sobbing. And then to the first responders cutting his clothes off of him, and then him in the back of the ambulance. And then the first responder answering my questions of "does he at least have a heartbeat" with "no...." and then the nurse on the bed doing chest compressions while they wheeled him through the ER. And the nurse holding me, and then to him in the room and the rush around him, drugs, IVs, monitors, palpable pain and everyone's hearts flooding to will my sweet boy back to life. And them stopping and his heart trying to work because of the drugs. And like that everything was turned upside down and inside out, and now dozens of families are witnessing and enduring similar things with the ones they love.

Don't exploit them or any person that's already victimized, don't post pictures of the bloodied crime scene and mangled bodies. Love them, be available, and be mindful.

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Thanks for reading and loving Bram!