Thursday, February 21, 2013

Meeting people on their worst day...

Sometimes you meet people on their worst day.

Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle. Ian MacLaren
Such true words! By and large people have been kind. I have deep valleys of appreciation for these beautiful people. I've found, with my very tender heart these days, that to be kind requires vulnerability. A certain amount of wearing your heart on your sleeve and good lump of bravery. Kind of oxymoronic, brave and vulnerable. But they exist as grief and love, facets of the same emotion.

I have sadly met people who haven't been brave or vulnerable, and have showed me unkindness in my grief. Nasty looks, harsh words, accusations, blaming. How I want to hate them. In the first couple weeks I would be just as mean as they were to me. To protect myself, putting up that shell, not allowing people in my world, not allowing their world to effect me. But our worlds, even if they are vastly different do effect one another. Just as the driver's world collided into mine, taking Bram from my world. As much as you dislike it, your life effects mine, maybe not directly, but in someway what you are doing, how you are living, how you treat others WILL effect me. Just as what I do and say WILL effect you.

It takes a lot of energy to be kind, being already broken and vulnerable it utterly exhausts me to not stop and scream at people who are living inside their own bubble, who don't dare wear their heart on their sleeve or think beyond themselves(see...affecting me...). It wipes me out so much I often can't leave the house, some days I can't leave my bed. On those days my sweet boys show me their kindness and their vulnerability and their bravery.

So be vulnerable, be brave, and be kind. If everyone dared to be so bold, to be so fearless, what a nicer place this would be... if only it had begun sooner... perhaps Bram would still be here.

1 comment:

  1. I remember this accident,I am so very sorry for your family. I am much more aware of what's going on in parking lots now and how people pay no attention to others walking in the lot. Peace to your family.

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Thanks for reading and loving Bram!